Inspiration from the Dalai Lama

I may have already stated this, (I really need to go back and read what I’ve written here.) but wanted to share that I am relieved that we have finally emptied Alma’s house, brought anything we thought she would want over to our house, and put it on the market. It took over a year to complete this task and the last day was quite emotional as I removed the very last of her belongings. It is very sad to know that she will never live on her own again. Fortunately, she is in a place of acceptance (or complacency might be more accurate) and finally appears fairly content and happy to be with us.

I am glad that we were all able to hang in there this year. There have been many times when Keith and I were concerned that we could no longer meet her needs. I know that time is coming and we are slowly preparing for that day. There have been many times when our youngest daughter, Wrenna has expressed frustration that has left me questioning whether or not this situation is the best for all of us. More than that, I have struggled with guilt over Alma taking over our eldest daughter’s room when she first broke her arm. Kaiya moved out shortly afterwards and I worry that she felt pushed out. That being said, for now, we are able to meet Alma’s needs, Wrenna is learning much about kindness and compassion (a great lesson for any adolescent), and Kaiya seems quite happy having a place of her own. Overall, we are grateful that Alma can continue here for the moment and hopefully, we will be open minded enough to know when we can no longer meet her needs and a transition needs to occur.

The reason these blog entries have been few and far between is there is little new to share. Alma is fairly stable at the moment and we have come into a routine of sorts. She goes to Adult Care roughly three times a week and I schedule that around days where they have special activities. I use those days to get things done that I can no longer accomplish with her in tow. On days that I have her with me, I try to keep things low key but try to find activities she enjoys. The key has been keeping things as simple as possible.

I chose the below quote as a reminder (mostly to myself) that our lives are cyclical. We all depend on the kindness and compassion of others. Therefore, it is vital to be mindful that compassion only exists when we treat everyone with the respect and kindness that we all deserve.

“Right from the moment of our birth, we are under the care and kindness of our parents, and then later on in our life when we are oppressed by sickness and become old, we are again dependent on the kindness of others. Since at the beginning and end of our lives we are so dependent on other’s kindness, how can it be in the middle that we would neglect kindness towards others?" ~ Dalai Lama