Still doing well....knock on wood

The summer has been a lot busier than I thought it was going to be so far and that has kept me from sharing how Alma is doing. One reason things have been so hectic is I went back to work at social services part time. Even though it was part time, juggling everyone has been difficult. Thankfully, they have finally hired my replacement and won't need me anymore so I can go back to focusing on Alma and the rest of my family. I have finally realized that I am not as good at multi-tasking as I thought I was.

On Friday, we took Alma back to Emeritus for the rest of her respite stay. We had to purchase a month and we broke it up so we could use it for various events. She will be there close to two weeks so anyone out there reading this who wants to visit is welcome. Even though we will be in town for a lot of that time, we do not plan to visit as it confuses her. However, we have contacted friends and I know that she will have some visitors. My concern is that all of this great settling in that has happened over the last several months will be compromised. However, I do not think it would be wise to take Alma camping with us and I have gotten two good nights of sleep in a row; something that has become rare now that she is up much of the night. Therefore, we are left with few alternatives.

Things have been going really well here with Alma. Honestly, Keith and I are really surprised about that. A couple of months ago when things were getting really rough, we had accepted the fact that we may need to consider moving her into assisted living permanently. We both agreed that we would only have her here as long as it was benefitting her and healthy for our family. We have always understood that it will probably get to be too much at some point. As hard as it will be, I think we will know when that time is here. Fortunately, we can hang on for now and that is the best thing for everyone involved.

However, something has shifted and most of the behaviors I was writing about for several months have ceased. I'm sure I'm over thinking it but it's almost as if her ego has become weak with this disease, enabling her to let go. Sadly, her confusion has increased and her level of functioning is decreased. She needs a lot more supervision and direction. Yet, she is so much happier and appears at peace. She laughs easily and "goes with the flow" better than I have even witnessed. I love that she is experiencing some time with lower inhibitions. Even though she is unable to process this mentally, I can't help but hold onto the thought that she is benefitting emotionally. Alma has always been someone who appears very reserved a guarded. While it is a big price to pay for emotional freedom, I feel certain that we can count this as a very small "upside" to this ridiculous and unpredictable disease.

I attached a like below that I shared a while back. I feel that it is a good sentiment that we all need to be reminded of. Witnessing Alma letting go of inhibitions and being vulnerable (whether it is conscious or not), has been a great eye opener for me. Even if you’ve already watched, please watch this short video again as we all need reminders about the importance of letting our guard down.



http://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_on_vulnerability.html